Children can really emphasize how normal our bodies are and how all of our adult behaviors are just things we made up. I’m still trying to teach my son that farts are hilarious. They are boring because he hears them all the time. They don’t really become special until you are with a bunch of adults trying to hide them.
Posts Tagged ‘poop’
Other popular names for dogs:
Sheeple (so each morning you can yell “Wake up Sheeple!”)
Back in college I was walking to class and about 50 yards from the door I got a big blob of bird poop in my hair. I thought it was a stick or something that hit me and instantly reached up and got it on my hand. I also tipped the balance of it so it started to ooze down the side of my head onto my cheek. I had to walk all the way back home and shower. I was very late for class.
In grade school we had a special day of classes where we learned about puberty and forthcoming changes to our bodies. We were split up into boys and girls and sent into separate rooms to see the presentations and ask questions. I seem to recall it was all stuff I had learned through other sources at that point except wait… what are they showing the girls? What are these secrets they are keeping from us?!
When I was a kid I didn’t understand a lot of things about nutrition or how humans worked. I was sure I could avoid the whole pooping problem by just drinking milk and never eating solid food. I never tried it though. McNuggets were too delicious.
It’s great when people wait until after you have eaten a new food to inform you about the expected side effects.
“Yeah these are delicious. Too bad you can’t eat them with milk. People usually die a few hours after eating them with milk. You haven’t had any milk today have you?”
Some people have cats that are trained to use a toilet. My friend has a cat that likes to use the bathroom but uses the sink instead of the toilet. Kind of a surprise when you go to wash your hands.
I stopped using SMS around 2005 or so. I have a few friends that are just getting around to using it now and occasionally send me messages. It’s always confusing because I first have to look up the number to see who the heck it is. I stopped knowing people’s phone numbers around 2005 or so.
Today’s Biff is winning.
This kind of this isn’t as much of a problem as it used to be. For the most part people around here walk their dogs on leashes and pick up after them. They also tend to stay out near the street by the sidewalk. All except for one dude. I guess the dog is the boss in his family and he will frequently walk the entire length of my front yard and stand right up against my front bay window to let his dog poop.
Today’s Biff makes quick decisions.
It’s good to establish the rules for dice throwing at the start of the game. We usually play that everything on the table top is fair game. If it bounces off another players Mountain Dew, don’t complain that you don’t like the outcome. Control your throw!