Posts Tagged ‘dog’
“I was a fool! Wait… does this mean that he would throw the ball but keep it in his hand as well? No, that’s too far fetched to even consider.”
Are you a puppy? Are you just a tiny, tiny puppy? Yes you are! Yes you are! I’m sorry officer… you were saying something about my rights?
My dog is very polite when she needs to remind me to feed her. She just sits near me and stares. Then she uses her mind control powers to make me turn my head and
look at her.
There’s a commonly held misconception that dogs evolved from wolves. How ridiculous! 80% of dogs are spontaneously formed from the heat and compression of too many socks in a clothes dryer. The rest are actually 6-8 guinea pigs joined together. This is the inspiration for Voltron.
Sometimes I’ll find a strange giant poop in my yard and wonder what sort of monster left it there. Sasquatch? Yeti? Bigfoot? Really big squirrel?
One of my favorite snacks is peanut butter on celery. Each bite gives you a sweet drink of water to wash down the peanut butter. It’s much better than my previous favorite snack of eating peanut butter off my fingers.
Would it be walking around all by itself? It could go wherever it wanted? What about when I have to pee?
When I was a kid I remember all the snacks we gave my dog were manmade simulations of things dogs would like. Lots of different “meat flavored” bone shaped things. Our current dog gets the actual items. It weirded me out the first time I went to that section of the pet store. It looked like a horror movie butcher set.