Posts Tagged ‘shark’
I always liked playing in the sprinkler as a kid. We had the rotating head style. I liked adjusting it so it would make a near 360 degree sweep and then do that quick staccato return back to the start. I think the waterfall style like in the strip was more fun to play in but I had to go to a friend’s house for that.
I certainly splashed in a puddle or two in my day but it quickly became a thing I avoided. I realized that all puddles aren’t just a few feet away from my house full of warm dry socks. You only have to sit through one movie in a chilly air conditioned theater with freezing soggy shoes to start stepping around them.
When I get food delivered it’s usually something like pizza. Just the main entree. A few time we’ve ordered from a place that give more of a full restaurant experience. It’s hilarious as they hand over bag after bag of food to hold all the breadsticks, appetizers, salads, soups entrees and desserts for 4 people. Then we have to spend 20 minutes opening everything to try and figure out who gets what. We would be done eating the pizza by now!
The first few hundred times I went swimming was in a pool. Kiddie pools in the yard, the public pool down the road or the pool at the hotel. It was such a different experience the first time we went to a beach. “There are things swimming around in the water other than people! Something touched my leg! Aaaaaa!”
I still love free sample day at the grocery store. I never knew when it was when I was a kid so when we hit the store on the right day it was a magical surprise. I get a little flashback of that feeling even now as an adult. Although now each sample is followed in my head by “Yeah… I would never buy that.”
Today’s Biff is filled to the brim.
When I was a kid the seats in movie theaters around here were still the old style of just a gradual incline from the front to the back. Now they have the much nicer “stadium seating”. The combination of the seat heights being close together and being a kid made many movies feature the silhouette of the giant head of the person sitting in front of me. My friends and I would frequently sit in the front row to prevent that. This was back when there was the front row, then 10 feet of floor, then the orchestra pit, then the stage, and then the screen. It was still an enjoyable location that didn’t involve neck strain.
Today’s Biff is good at multitasking.
Really it’s better to just bring your own lunch from home. You have to make sure the gags and restraints are tight though. No sense disturbing your coworkers with all that screaming and flailing around.
Today’s Biff isn’t playing with a full deck.
I got really bad at this type of conversation at my last job. Someone would see me on Monday morning and it would go something like this:
“Hey Chris, what did you do this weekend?”
I would realize later that I was supposed to ask them what they did. I must have missed out on some great stories. It will haunt me forever.
One of the more frustrating things I run into when looking for work is people only wanting someone that has already done the exact job they are hiring for.
“Designer needed. Must know Photoshop and have general office computer skills. Looking for a self starter with a clean sense of design. Must have a minimum of 8 years experience designing for an art director with the first name of ‘Alfred’ while sitting at a northwest facing desk on the second floor of a 5 story office building with an average ambient temperature of 73 degrees fahrenheit.”
Of course 1 week after you are hired, Alfred retires and your department is moved to the fourth floor anyway.