I get some crazy dreams when I fall asleep on the couch. All the activity, people talking, TV playing seeps in. I wonder if our pets get the same thing. Their dream about chasing a bunny changes into running away from the giant robots you are fighting with across the room on your game system.
Posts Tagged ‘dog’
One of the scariest things I had to deal with when I was a kid was dogs. In the warm months I would walk to and from school. Occasionally the timing of those walks would intersect with a dog that was extremely put out by my proximity to his nose. The furiously barking dogs were scary but the silent ones were the worst. They would already be halfway across the yard by the time the movement registered in my peripheral vision. My brain would frantically search for evidence of some sort of leash and then it would look at the ground near my feet for a worn down patch that signaled how far that leash reached. Hopefully that worn spot was between me and the dog. Now all there was to do was hold my breath and hope that this wasn’t that final lunge that broke through that flimsy looking collar.
Our dog has lots of toys but she loses interest in them quickly if it doesn’t have a squeaker in it. There’s something soothing and relaxing about that squeak to her. I assume it fills the spot in her brain that desires the sound of a small rabbit squealing as she crushes it in her tiny jaws. Then I try to think of something else and I silently thank her as she refrains from biting my nose off whenever I lean in to whisper secrets about humans that she will never understand.
I used to have the worst time with stuck jar lids. Bang it on the counter, run it under hot water, bang it a few more times. Nothing. Then one day we got a sill rubber disc in the mail as an ad for a chiropractor. Perfect! Thank you whoever it was that had their ad rub off the disc after a few turns.
I enjoy the new style of board games that take less than an hour to play. The ones I grew up with were such a commitment that I constantly turned down playing them. “Uh no thanks, I have to go to bed in 8 hours. There’s just not enough time for that.” On more than one occasion a game of Risk was carefully transferred to the top of the refrigerator so it could be completed after a round of sleep and showering.
There are some friends that will spoil your pets in the same way that grandparents spoil their grandchildren.
“Lisa, seriously, we are going to be late for the film. Mr. Barks will still be here when we get back, the DVD you made of you talking to him will be more than enough company.”
I never tried to make spaghetti until after I moved away for college. I had experience making macaroni and cheese and so I figured it was basically the same technique, just a different shape. I got the water boiling and put the noodles in. Somehow it didn’t occur to me that the noodles were more than twice the height of the pot. They stuck out over the edge and within a few seconds caught fire. Luckily it was only half the box and after I cleaned up the mess I had a second chance.
Our dog goes nuts for carrots. She knows the word, she knows them by sight, she knows the sound of the little plastic bag they are stored in the refrigerator. But unlike most everything else she is allowed to eat, we eat them as well. This confuses the heck out of her. “Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, now… what do you have there? Carrots? I didn’t realize it was snack time already! What a wonderful surprise! Hey wait what are you doing with tha… WHY ARE YOU EATING MY CARROTS! WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE!! WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS TORTURE!!!”
It would really be so much easier if pets would just use english already. I spend too much time trying to learn dog pantomime. They should get with the program and be more specific! If you have to go outside then don’t start playing with Mr. Squeaky Bone when I offer him to you. It’s confusing for everyone.